Two of a kind

We have a formula for kids, they are all variations on the same theme. Cara and Viktor have similar eyes, mouth, noses but although the parts are similar they are set slightly different in their faces. Viktor is starting to look like Martin after years of being a spitting image of my Dad and Cara and I so alike we could be cloned. And then sometimes Martin will shine though Cara and Viktor will look like Dad again - all a big soup of genetic recombination. Sigge is a Martin look-alike with Cara's temper - at least we think so - unfortunately no-one seems to remember what Martin looked like and we have no pictures to compare him too. In personalities they differ more and when Viktor always was a very easy and happy baby, Cara and Sigge are more temperamental. Viktor picked up some challenging liveliness when he started to walk so we are possibly looking at a combination of a temperamental baby and a lively toddler in Sigge. Will be interesting to follow the sibling interactions over the years, at the moment Cara treats Sigge like a human doll, cuddles him, change his clothes, picks him up and keeps him in bed, stroking him like a puppy when she is reading.

Last day on my own with the kids

lunching in a little cave - Cara made bulgursalad, we bought some bread, cheese and salami from the local delicatessen, water and fruit makes an easy picnic.
Cara and Viktor went looking for leeches
sigge talks to a leave...
....the leaves never answer...
...nevertheless leaves make wonderful baby-sitters as sigge can talk to them for hours.

The last three weeks with Martin working and me at home with all the kids have been busy but good. We have done a lot and very little and the days seldom turned out as we planned them but were more often than not enjoyed by all. Yesterday we went to a botanical garden close to us, tried a back-road and got caught in a wood - I had the pram and Viktor's bike and Cara swore all the way through twigs and stones. Amazing grasp of questionable parts of the English language. We got there in the end and sat down for a picnic in my favorite cave, close to fern heaven. And then we watched the crops and had some cake and met up with Martin, bought lavender for the balcony (our pansies finally died) and went for an evening dip in Brunnsviken. And now we look forward to a week together to hand Sigge over to Martin's tender care.

Lazy days,

My life is focused on giving this little man the best possibilities to do his own thing - development just happens if the babies are in the right environment and I don't want to stress him out - thus we aim for lazy days. Cara would love to be left to read and play computer games through her 10-12 weeks of summer holidays (we dare not count) but instead we do a little every day and it works out really nice.

Viktor finds playgrounds everywhere and it seems I have managed to build little town-kids.

He loves this space under Grand Hotel - found it in the spring under purple pensies

and returned in the summer to show Cara on the way from the Museum of Modern Art - a perfect day out for us all, and it is funny how the main attraction often turns out to be something else that what we came for - there is a little sculpture park with some Picasso at the local MOMA and it was a good place for some sword-fighting but nothing beats this part of Grand Hotel.and then something happened and the game was off and we quickly moved away to new adventures.
Cara found a mirror and danced a little waiting for us to cross the streets.

There is a lot to say for having a holiday at home with a little baby, Cornwall was wonderful but had been a nightmare on my own. I have always loved Stockholm in July, another continent, very quiet, all the busy stylish stressed people are gone and replaced by tourists. Never done it with kids though - turns out that is even better. My first week of feeling bad for depriving the children the classic Swedish summer quickly disappeared and now we just enjoy this rare time together.

Birthday Boy!

Happy as happy can be with the a new Star Wars game, new Star Wars bag, new Star Wars Lego. I am so over the successful Star Wars campaign (Viktor loves it but sometimes I wonder if on Star wars T shirt wouldn't be more special, materialism never got to me I guess) and look forward to starting Mum's Birthday present - a butterfly farm where we can follow metamorphism from eggs to butterflies.

We went to Mum's, made a cake (even the sponge and custard)

Mum and Cara are always in deep conversation

It was a good day, pancake breakfast followed by lunch and cake at Mum's followed by Viktor's favorite dumplings just down the road. In Viktor's world Mormor knows all about everything in the world. Mum loves that, chuckles that finally someone has discovered her true worth.

Viktor turns six

isn't it amazing? And he is turning into such a sweet little boy.

All these kids

At some point I will write a little more - for now I am busy cooking, cleaning, washing, reading stories, taking kids swimming, planning, kissing, arguing, it is all very wonderful. And breast-feeding a good three hours a day or so, the boy enjoys his food and that is hard to combine with anything but reading -- my book or reading to Viktor. My few quiet moments in a day I put on the computer and try to get back into work or take the bike out and try to get back into my body. Both with excellent carrots - back to work in a week and at last it feels like I have something going in the lab after a long time of building a platform. As for the body Martin and I are going to a wedding filled with beautiful young people in September and I want to look smashing and stay out all night drinking champagne with my husband.

For now I just want to enjoy every little moment. Sigge is grabbing, laughing, squealing, growing. And starting to eat a little porridge at 11 am - need to wean him softly as I will not be around in two weeks time. Starting work is always painful but if I want equality there are costs and most of them paid by setting maternal instincts aside. But he is fine with martin too and I firmly believe in our way of doing so. And life is a little painful I guess.

Work and kids - the first of many posts to come...

Stockholm is a beautiful place in the summer, a day spent on a little island opposite Old Town

Sigge was happy

and I had some peace to think at a cafe.

The day after I had a long skype session and Sigge played happily and fell asleep in the kitchen. This is how I imagined parental leave and it works with 1-2 but not with 3 kids at home.

Parental leave in Sweden is truly fantastic - 13 months with 80% of the income to be shared between the parents and another half a year at a minimal income. There is no reason to rush back to work. Back at work each child under 12 entitles 120 days a year off for care during short term sickness - if the kid is off more than a week a doctors certificate is needed. So 2 - 3 kids pretty much allows parents to be off full time.

Day-care is cheap and cheerful and often great places for the kids to learn and play. Unfortunately they are pretty useless for the few of us that enjoy work and wants to combine work and kids. Nannies are not an option at my level of income. Au pairs often leads to more grief than help and child-cares run wild at the moment, closing at 4 pm more often than not, the govermental promise of a 6.30-18.30 policy is never in place. The number of planning days, educational days, excursions and parties in the middle of the day is increasing exponentially - and no-one wants to be the parent missing out on the kids proudly presenting the last project. If I could have it my way I would pay dearly for a service where someone could come to our home the few days when a child is sick and I have to work. Or Sigge is too small for day-care and I have to work. Or I simply have to finish something and need a little space to think. I still consider myself extremely lucky to live in this society where women can work and reproduce but it is a little frustrating at times. At the moment I work 4 hrs a week of which 2 from home and 2 from work. Some days it works but with cara and viktor home on school holidays (until the end of August) I don't find time for all the work that scientists do outside office-hours - reading, planning, writing, preparing lectures. I decided to take time off until I go back to work in August and just enjoy the summer and the kiddies for now.